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Series

Crossing Swords

2020★ 6.22 seasons

Goodhearted hero wannabe Patrick lands his dream job as a squire, only to learn the royal castle is a corrupt hornet’s nest of horny monarchs, crooks and charlatans. War, murder, full frontal nudity—who knew brightly colored peg people led such exciting lives?

ComedyAnimation
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Cast

Featured cast

Episodes

1PilotYoung Patrick dreams of earning his knighthood and dispensing justice to evildoers. He’s driven by his goodhearted, earnest nature, but also by guilt…23 min2Hot Tub Death MachinePatrick’s excitement to start his new squire job is quickly dampened when he is placed in charge of deciding who to execute as part of King Merriman’…23 min3What’s Kraken?When Patrick scores highly coveted tickets to a Kraken watching cruise for his parents, he sees an opportunity to impress his hard-to-please father. …23 min4In the Line of SquireAs a string of high-profile assassinations rock the kingdom, the headstrong and petulant Princess Blossom returns home from school to attend a giant …23 min5Let Them Eat ClownPatrick is thrilled to escort King Merriman to a charity golf retreat, only to arrive and find out it’s actually the Chill Society, an annual bacchan…23 min6My Super Sweet Period PartyAs the only uncut squire, Patrick is horrified to learn that he will need to undergo a circumcision to keep his job. Meanwhile, as Blossom celebrates…23 min7Look Who’s StalkingFed up with a string of bad investments that have led the kingdom to bankruptcy, King Merriman throws out a pot of “magic beans,” which quickly grow …23 min8The Snow JobWhen a deadly plague sweeps through the Kingdom, Patrick accompanies the royal family north to stay safe, isolated in an icy ski lodge. While the fam…23 min9The A-Moooo-Zing RaceThe assassin has orchestrated the kidnapping of Princess Blossom, and a Minotaur holds her captive in its maze. Now the King and Queen must abdicate …23 min10Unchained MonarchyPatrick returns to the castle with the rescued Princess Blossom only to find it under siege. The minotaur maze was only part of the assassin’s deviou…23 min

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